Full House on Elm Street, Parody Mashup Short Story

Explain Yerself!

Stephanie is attacked in the tub, WHAM! Family is there to help. Unnatural creatures pour from a dark dimension and a terrible, bloody, and sexually elicit war is raged inside this San Francisco residence. One Hollywood creature is stirring, and it isn't Mickey F&%^'N Mouse! Grab them bandages; it's TGI F&%KIN" Friday!

Gimme'a taste...

“What is this wet slippery thing?”

Stephanie screamed.

She darted out the bathroom. Her towel clung to her body.

Oh, don’t be a prude. This is me, in like, season eight when I developed and started flaunting a little sexuality for all the boys who were growing up too fast and to keep them from outgrowing the show.

Her little TGIF cupcakes danced in bouncing twirls. We are so happy and jiggly, they sang.

“HELP!” Steph shouted again.

Before Joey even heard her shout; he sensed Steph’s naked body. He could always tell when she was naked, but this time it was different. “I better go check this out!”

He put Mr. Woodchuck down.

His puppet was dressed as Wonder Woman, wig and all. Mr. Woodchuck’s small blue panties were askew.

I wasn’t doing nothin’ swears-zies. I was just trying out different costumes out on Mr. Woodchuck. Nothin’ sexual; no sir.

DJ got up from her bed and ran to the door. “What’s the matter Steph?” she asked.

Steve was left sitting on the bed.

Damn, now I got this boner to deal with. Not that that’s unusual. DJ is such a boner tease; I don’t know why I’m with her sometimes. Damn the devil to hell!

His cock raged and balls were swollen. How many seasons will it take to bang her little sofa cushion? And now, what’s this with Stephanie?

Stephanie met DJ at the bedroom door.

“The bathroom,” Stephanie said, “Something was in the tub with me!” She was panting from adrenaline.

Steve looked over. Seriously? I’m horny as fuck and have been storing a nut for 18 years and now; Stephanie is standing there soaking wet all naked except for that little towel. I mean look at her. I can see them little titties through the thread bare towel. Come on! Cut me a break here.

“Something was in the tub?” DJ asked, “Let’s go see.” She turned to Steve, “Steve you coming?”

I wish I was. “Um, yeah just a moment.” Damn, why won’t she ever put out with her pink Jebly? All I’m asking for is to fill her belly with a quick sticky load and have her beg for me for more; you know? What’s the problem with that?

DJ and Steph went across the hall to the bathroom. on the way DJ called out, “DAD!”

“I’m here DJ, what’s the problem?”

He appeared out of nowhere along with Joey and Jesse.

Joey eyed Stephanie’s biscuits.

Well, blow me down, he said like Popeye in his head, she’s all wet, and nude, and damn, I wanna’ make her my sausage biscuit sand’ ich number five breakfast, please, oh please, oh please! Look at the way her tittie biscuits press at that towel. VROOM! HUBBA HUBBA WHOA!

His eyes traced her collarbone and then dropped.

Oh, they are so small and squishy. I just want to cuddle them and love on them. Oh, you’re so pretty little titties. Are those her nipples? It can’t be-

-Yes, it is-

-No-

-Yes; oh, strawberry gumdrops my balls hurt.

Danny noticed too, No I didn’t. And he jerked off in the shower later thinking about it; no, I didn’t. I was thinking about Kimmy-

-dammit;

No, I wasn’t thinking about Kimmy or Steph. Hey… wait! I didn’t do anything in the shower.

“What’s wrong,” Danny asked. Don’t look at her corn muffins.

“In there; something grabbed me,” Steph said and pointed.

Danny marched in and had himself a good fatherly look around.

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Look here, need money fer booze'n drugs. Gotta' get'a hot tub'n some bitches, but need ta sell bookz ta do dat.